At some point in life, we all need guidance and advice. You are lucky or too wise if this does not happen too often.
Yet, the rest of us often turn to our best friends, parents, siblings, or a colleague to help us whenever we feel confused, unable to solve a problem, or simply whenever we are in a situation we have never been before.
Some seem to be better at advising than others. These people seem to always find the right words, know to comfort and encourage in an instant, and conversations with them can do wonders!
Here are 17 words of wisdom you need to remember at times when you need unbiased advice:
1. “Live like you were dying, Love because you are.” – Mark Green.
2. “Never lie in bed at night asking yourself questions you can’t answer.” – Charles M. Schulz
3. “Don’t be in a hurry to achieve your dreams. Take a day to play with your kids and relax – your dreams will still be there tomorrow.” Lindsey Rietzsch
4. “Yesterday’s gone, so has the day before. Don’t let’s waste today arguing about it” -Joan G. Robinson
5. “Don’t ever take a fence down until you know why it was put up.” – Robert Frost
6. “If you have to convince someone to stay with you, then they have already left.” – Shannon Alder
7. “The past is behind, learn from it. The future is ahead, prepare for it. The present is here, live it.” – Thomas S. Monson
8. “Find joy in everything you choose to do. Every job, relationship, home… it’s your responsibility to love it, or change it.” – Chuck Palahniuk
9. “Take time to know yourself. Know thyself. When you know who you are, you can be wise about your goals, your dreams, your standards, your convictions. Knowing who you are will allow you to live your life with purpose and meaning.” – Aristotle
10. “Even though you may want to move forward in your life, you may have one foot on the brakes. In order to be free, we must learn how to let go. Release the hurt. Release the fear. Refuse to entertain your old pain. The energy it takes to hang onto the past is holding you back from a new life. What is it you would let go of today?” – Mary Manin Morrissey
11. “The way to happiness: Keep your heart free from hate, your mind from worry. Live simply, expect little, give much. Scatter sunshine, forget self, think of others. Try this for a week, and you will be surprised.” – Norman Vincent Peale
12. “We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand.” – Randy Pausch
13. “Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and allow you to commit more.” – Mark Twain
14. “Everything in moderation, including moderation.” – Oscar Wilde
15. “Never ruin an apology with an excuse.“- Benjamin Franklin
16. “There are no foolish questions, and no man becomes a fool until he has stopped asking questions.” – Charles Steinmetz
17. “Rule of life. If you bother to ask someone’s advice, then bother to listen to it.” – Sophie Kinsella
If someone close turns to you for advice or directions, here are some useful tips to help you:
- Before offering an advice, listen carefully. Pay attention to every detail, to fully understand the situation. While actively listening, you help the person to put the problem into words, which is often the fastest way to its solution. Sometimes, people just need to speak about the problem once more, so just help them find what they want or need on their own. This is often the best guidance you can offer.
- Always be honest and never judge the other person. No one needs to become even more vulnerable after asking for help.
- If you have been in a similar situation or know someone who has gone through the same, the past experiences will help you give a good advice. Ask questions to understand things better, and think what would you have done if you were in their position. Tell a story, as it is what the person will remember in the end. In this way, you will make your advice human, relatable and real.
- Don’t forget to inject emotion, as the best advice must contain it.
- Never give unsolicited advice. Advise when permitted. No one wants to feel like speaking to an amateur psychiatrist. If you are not asked to speak, just be a good listener.
- Help the other frame the problem, brainstorm everything together, and provide options. In the end, the other has to come up with the solution by himself.
- Explain that the final decision will always be theirs, but you will remain a source of support and trust.