Longing to be appreciated for their charm and beauty, narcissists are some of the most arrogant, egotistical, and vain human beings that you could ever meet in your life.
They are also high-conflict people (HCPs), preoccupied to blame others and see them as targets of blame just to feel superior, which they truly believe they are.
According to the story, Narcissus was a person obsessed with his looks and charm, and he attracted the ire of a goddess claimed to be Nemesis, goddess of vengeance against beings who were consumed by their own arrogance.
She made him fall in love with a reflection of his own image, so he died from staring at himself for his entire life. In general, narcissists lack self-awareness, so their self-esteem depends on the way people perceive them.
A narcissist engages in a lot of all-or-nothing thinking, unmanaged emotions, and extreme behavior, which involves constant insults, repeated admiration demands, putting themselves up by putting others down, and identifying themselves as winners and everyone else as losers.
They are projection-heavy individuals, meaning that they deny their flaws and do not accept their mistakes, but blame others for their misfortunes instead.
Narcissists believe they are super-ultra-turbo-mega special, and they deserve exceptional treatment, or that they are justified in hurting others.
Moreover, externalizing blame is a fundamental feature of their modus operandi. According to traditional viewpoints, they simply have to, as it would internally decimate them to fault themselves, and such an emotional pain is too great for them to bear, as it could crush their “fragile” egos.
Therefore, they choose to put up defenses of denial and projection.
Here are five different ways in which narcissists with sociopathic and psychopathic tendencies project, hurt, confuse, and blame people around them:
1. They play victims
This is one of the most common practices. Narcissists usually provoke you at first, and when you respond appropriately to their aggression, they manipulate to make you the abuser that hurts them, and they are the victim.
The audience often does not know the entire story, and many will take the side of the narcissist. This restores their high self-esteem since they receive the false validation that they are righteous and good.
2. They blame others for their advantage
When narcissists ask for regret, they actually try to blame the other to hide what they do not want to be known. Narcissists will pretend, lie, hurt or exploit others, or do whatever else they deem necessary for personal gain.
Gaslighting is a popular method to twist reality for their own benefit and make others doubt their perceptions, memory, and sanity.
3. They call you things that you are not
Narcissists are extremely selfish, but they blame others to be selfish instead. They always forget the things others have done for them and keep expecting and asking, thinking about their needs only.
They also blame others for doing something behind their back, while they are the ones doing it. If a narcissistic person feels threatened, they will sabotage and destroy the other person. They will not think twice before they call you the things that they themselves are as or are afraid that others see them as.
Also, they believe they are entitled to all of the resources of their partners or close ones and will try various abuse and manipulation tactics to make you feel bad and eventually give in to their demands.
4. Unrealistically high expectations of life
Over the years, a narcissist has created layers of false pretenses, and they end up believing that the world owes something to them.
They cannot accept reality and they fall victims to their false self-perceived notions of grand roles, and if you try to explain to them what is really happening, they will e in their own believe you are making an excuse. They reject to see the world as it is and prefer to live in their own fantasies.
Triangulation is often used in conflicted family situations, and its goal is for the narcissist to find a scapegoat.
It is a rise of tension between family members due to one person selectively communicating or not communicating the truth, misleading, and creating a different version of the story to aggravate the tension.