A child is a true miracle and a blessing in every family. However, parenting is undeniably the most challenging job in life. Every child is a new story and a distinct personality, so providing adequate care and guidance is a huge responsibility to bear.
Parents are their children’s role models, so every single word they say and every action they do, and even the tone of their sentences, affect the psychological and emotional development of their child.
The arrival of a child into the world of parents is not unexpected, but it is definitely a new, undiscovered feeling, an unexplored territory for them. Therefore, they need some time to get used to always thinking twice before uttering a word.
Parents are imperfect just like everyone else, but setting the methods straight, especially during the formative stages of the development of the child, is a must.
To raise a healthy, confident, sharp, and stable child, parents should insist on proper communication, and avoid yelling or nagging at their children, as kids are incredibly emotional.
To ensure their bright future, and help them turn into strong, happy, and well-mannered adults, make sure you repeat these things to your children:
1. I Love You- Your child does not know that you love him as you do, so make sure you say it with genuine emotion and show it in numerous ways during the day. Tell your children you love them even when they are adults. This will let them know they can trust you, and they will feel safe, content, cherished, and cared for.
2. I’m sorry- Apologize when you are late, when you couldn’t go to see their game, and when you were too busy to spend more time with them. Also, apologize when you have burst in anger, or could not control your behavior in front of their children and you hurt them in a way. This will teach them to apologize when wrong and they shouldn’t repeat your reaction.
According to psychologist Dr. Sherrie Campbell: “When we own our wrongs, we teach our kids by example to do the same. This helps develop humility.”
3. I’m proud of you- To boost the confidence of your child, tell him that you are proud of his successes and progress, and boost him to keep doing well to get better. Encourage your children to be aware of their potential and work hard to achieve success in whatever field they choose. Children need praise more than criticism.
4. This is your responsibility- Be the couch in the game: prepare your children for it, cheer from the side, and then review their work. Always give your children responsibilities to teach them how to cope with obligations.
You can ask them to prepare breakfast for all of you, water the plants, go to the mall, or visit their grandparents during the weekends.
5. I’m listening- When your child reaches the teen age, you can no longer have the control, and all you have to fight for is a positive influence. Always listen to what your kids have to say, even when they are very small. Point out the importance of communication as a way to express emotions, and to strengthen your bond.
6. You’ve got what it takes- Teach your children to never give up and never suspect their abilities. Encourage them to work hard to succeed, and even if they fail, the next attempt will be a victorious one.
7. I forgive you- A parent should never tolerate bad behavior as the lack of discipline will lead to destruction. Yet, don’t forget to teach your children the power of forgiveness, as a way to release anger and disappointment. Again, remind them that you love them.
Being a parent means that you will often feel like a lecturer while upbringing your children. Communication is the most powerful tool you have to raise your children into responsible, empathic, and self-aware adults.
Therefore, to make sure they are listening to what you have to say, you should never scream or yell. Use an affectionate tone, and try to see things from their perspective.
Don’t be too sweet, and use fewer words, but emphasize the point. You can mention a real-life story. Rephrase your words if it seems you are not understood.
Don’t repeat your questions, and towards the end of the talk, hold their hand, or touch their shoulder.
Remember, children thrive on positive attention. Therefore, keep reminding them how much you love and appreciate them, even when they have made a mistake. Carefully select the phrases you use, and they will pay more attention to your point. Don’t underestimate the power of positive feedback.